do i read more books or do i spend more time interneting?
i spent fall reading ulysses. i spent winter reading infinite jest. when i was in high school, i went to an art exhibit where there was an igloo made of books. it smelled really nice inside and i felt safe in there, but now i think i might be trapped in that proverbial igloo. blah blah blah, i'm trapped in an ivory tower...
i posted a Facebook status asking if i should start a blog, not because i care about the opinions of my Facebook friends (i would apologize, but you would know i was lying. let's be real.) but more because i realized that the size of my potential audience is inverse to the amount i care. twitter? tumblr? potentially infinite possibilities for the world to see/read the shit i post, 0 fucks given. instagram/facebook... whatever, it's all pointless pictures of flowers and anaïs nin quotes anyways. snapchat? text? if you don't respond within twelve hours i'll either mourn the death of our friendship (in tears) or awkwardly, aggressively confront you about it in person. and everyone knows that's a faux pas; the virtual world is virtual, the real world is real, and never the twain shall meet.
the reality is that internet stakes are generally quite low. i have no delusions of internet fame. it's like when you're at a party and you hit on that slightly skeevy type because he likes franny and zooey even though he straight-up told you he deals molly, because you'll never have to interact with or even see him again. (this is a real story and an embarrassing one, mostly embarrassing because i thought that liking salinger was something special. it's not.)
other real concerns i ha(d)(ve):
- how to get people to read blog (besides paying them. people like money.)
- how not to make blog heinous (impossible; give up any graphic design aspirations and let "words speak for themselves," as if that wasn't the function of words since the dawn of language.)
- what to call blog (well-intentioned and creative friend suggestions: "H-Town Blogz," "prose before penis," "hay is for vegan cats." my original yet clearly problematic ideas: "skateboarding goats," "dolphin screams," and most simply (and my personal favorite) "PIZZA.")
for now, these concerns will remain unaddressed. perhaps the nebulous will sort itself out, like when the stars align. more likely, however, i will continue to type nonsense to the tune of yé-yé, trying feverishly not to spill milky coffee on my laptop in a misguided attempt to write a love sonnet to a cold universe, like throwing fistfuls of flower petals at the wind...